It’s pretty tough out there sometimes… am I right? The Wedding Industry with it’s seasons, peaks and troughs and completely unpredictable work load can play havoc with our mental health at the best of times. For most of us, let’s be honest, it’s hard work just keeping the buzz going.
And perhaps the irony is, the Wedding Industry requires us to be buzzing, switched on, fired up! It thrives on our creativity and our passion. But it takes so much from us in the process.
That’s OK! That’s what we signed up for!
But beneath the shiny surface of social media posts, stunning styled shoots and glossy magazine articles lie the real human beings that need to sustain all that energy and enthusiasm throughout a largely unpredictable lifestyle. A lifestyle that in itself, is actually incredibly difficult to balance around family and friends.
I’d like to introduce you to Wedding Industry Mental Health – an initiative by Wedding Espresso to give you a safe space to explore your frustrations, your emotional rollercoasters and your current state of mind.
A relaxed but professional environment where you CAN talk freely, where your privacy is paramount, and your frustrations, concerns and problems are both understood and respected.
This isn’t Counselling and it’s not Psychotherapy, but rather a safety net for Wedding Suppliers to just talk it through with someone who knows the industry first hand and can empathise with your pain points.
Talking therapy can be amazing in the form of self realisation and realistic goal setting. My aim with Wedding Industry Mental Health is to get you back on track BEFORE you de-rail by nurturing all that is good, passionate and worthwhile in you.
I put myself through rigorous training to step up to help you and am donating considerable resources to freely provide this help.
For me, Wedding Industry Mental Health awareness is a movement and rather than hiding it, we need to talk about it!
If you’re interested in learning more, or becoming a Wedding Industry Mental Health Advocate…
You must have experienced this before? A friend, maybe a family member, approaches you to ask for some help, or to talk, or to get some advice.
Now of course, naturally, we offer that help without hesitation.
What we don’t ever stop to consider… is whether we SHOULD!
Now I’m not saying that we should turn people away or reject them…
But rather build the skill to know HOW to help them in the best possible way.
Allow me to elaborate…
You already have some form of opinion, or memory, maybe even trauma or fear or even preconception of every single possible situation under the sun.
Now if someone comes to you with a request for support, it’s important to first understand what that person has experienced or is experiencing… from their own perspective, and not yours.
Basically to determine whether you have any underlying issues with the subject matter that could colour your judgement or implicitly force your own opinions or experience on the other person.
That right there, that’s an ethical dilemma!
Trained Skilled Helpers have trained professionally in the ability to bypass this judgement and self projecting, and see the other person’s situation as their own, through the other person’s own lens.
And that is precisely why it’s good to talk with someone who is ethically trained. Because they will get alongside YOUR ideas, YOUR thoughts and YOUR experiences and understand them through YOUR lens.
Need to reach out or feel you’d like to become a Wedding Industry Mental Health Advocate?
We’d love to hear from you!
Get support and join the conversation here:
Like most Wedding Suppliers, I’m a do’er! I thrive when I’m creating and I’m at my absolute best when I have something creative to share with the world.
Like you, I’ve been through my own share of self doubt, wondering if what I’m doing is any good, whether anyone will like it, or criticise it, or even ridicule me!!
But time is a wonderful teacher and I’ve been doing this for over half of my lived life now.
These days, I just put it out there.
Of course, I always plan and try my creative best, but I’m less concerned with the opinions of others as it colours and degrades what I feel I’m truly capable of. You might relate?
That being said, I’ve found that mucking in and putting the fear of the unknown aside is one of the most powerful tools in the tool box. So often the very act of just doing is so liberating and exciting that that process alone is SUCH a boost to ongoing positive mental health.
You like to create, so you know exactly what I’m talking about!!
One aspect of my initiative, Wedding Industry Mental Health, is the provision of a creative workshop that enables all Wedding Suppliers to meet and create in a safe and supportive environment, to feel out new possibilities, to play with opportunity without consequence and to build confidence through creative output.
Essentially, I’m removing the fear of doing and the fear of trying!
And that in my opinion, is SUCH an important step in building positive mental resilience. It’s the “always having something good on the horizon” kind of thinking. The safety in the knowledge that you WILL be making something new this month and it will be fun, and you will meet other Wedding Suppliers who get you, along the way!
Our monthly creative workshop in support of Wedding Industry Mental Health is also helping to provide support for Wedding Suppliers who need one to one time to talk about their problems, frustrations and emotional load.
By boosting your own mental resilience, you’re also helping to support others in need.
I like to think it’s a win, win!
Add yourself to the conversation here:
Have you ever had someone just treat you badly? What am I saying??? …. OF COURSE YOU HAVE!!!
Humans are odd creatures, fallible, unpredictable and often completely self centred and socially destructive.
When we look at others, it’s often hard not to judge. We persecute because we’re in constant judgement of ourselves. We forcibly apply our own values and subjective opinions on others. It basically harks back to a time when we needed to survive in tribes. We actively seek “our” tribe. That’s how we used to survive!
But today, things are different! Waaaaaay different!
Global connectivity has made us a global community – our potential to tribe is nearly endless and yet we still brand, objectify, isolate, reject and repel others.
A famous psychologist called “Carl Rogers” created a way of thinking called “Unconditional Positive Regard” – essentially taking everyone at face value and relating to them positively, regardless of our baked in opinions and judgements.
Hard? You bet it is!
But as skilled helpers, we’ve undergone rigorous training to understand the complexities and nuances of Unconditional Positive Regard.
My work with Wedding Industry Mental Health incorporates this very skill and ensures that we are open to ALL people from ALL walks of life, every nation, every colour, every race, every gender, every opinion, feeling, thought process and history.
There is no judgement here, only empathy and compassion.
If you’d like to learn more about Unconditional Positive Regard and how you can use techniques like these to better support those around you…
Become a Wedding Industry Mental Health Advocate today:
You may or may not know this!!! But many help and support services are evidence led.
Now that means that in order to provide you with support, that support needs to produce a body of evidence to demonstrate it’s efficacy.
Ultimately, that leads to box ticking, generalisation and labelling.
I don’t know about you but I don’t fit in a box, I’m not a “general” person and I’m not a fan of labels.
You don’t get to package me up and ship me off!
So where does that leave us?
That leaves us with the Person Centred Approach!
That is, giving consideration to the person sat in front of us, as an individual with individual needs, with their own lived experiences and with their own viewpoints, feelings and emotions.
You’re not A or B, X or Y… but rather a multitude of possibilities that make up the complexity and beauty of being a living person!
So with Person Centred Approach, our aim is to listen to YOU. To hear your story, to truly hear how you feel.
It’s widely believed that this is the best way to provide support to someone.
To get alongside them, to metaphorically hold their hand and allow them to shape the narrative in front of us both, as they see it.
If you’re struggling with Wedding Industry Mental Health and need someone to get alongside you, try our Person Centred Approach and understand what it means to be treated as an individual.
Join us here:
More than ever before, we’re truly aware of just how much artists and creatives suffer!
The very act of creating something comes from a place of “extra” reality. The ability to see beyond what “is” and to mentally project what “could be”.
That’s both an exciting and slightly terrifying concept!
On the one hand, and speaking personally, it means the world to me to be able to put the sparks of my imagination to the flames of productivity and manifest new things in our reality.
On the other hand, that process comes with endless relentless self doubt, self criticism and regular doses of imposter syndrome.
All those negative feelings that make us question whether what we’ve created is good enough.
How many artists have recently publicly shared their own struggles with crippling anxiety and mental health issues?
And that’s a preconditioned part of the creative process. To continually strive for better, for more, nothing ever truly being good enough.
There’s a quote I love: “A Work of Art Is Never Finished, Merely Abandoned” – credited to a number of authors and poets over the years…
But it’s essentially correct! Perfectionism is something which affects us all. That never ending quest for just a bit more or just a bit better.
It is simultaneously what lifts us up to do great things and brings us down into the depths of despair.
These heightened emotional states are so common in our industry. Our own personal angels and demons.
With Wedding Industry Mental Health I’m championing the concept of losing the fear of trying. To get it out there regardless. To build up that mental resilience and to fight back against these feelings of inadequacy and failure.
Sometimes, it’s fun and mentally satisfying to just have a go at something without the usual pressures that cause so much anxiety, frustration, disappointment and anger.
Wedding Industry Mental Health actively promotes the opportunity to get involved with creative output that doesn’t stress you out, that doesn’t have high expectation and doesn’t take itself too seriously.
We’re about supporting each other whilst having fun, in a welcoming, friendly and understanding environment.
Join us here:
Hello, I’m a human! Like you!
As humans, our needs are complicated, convoluted and contrived!
Now you may have heard of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs which essentially presents every basic human need in a pyramid with basic survival stuff at the bottom, and more esoteric feeling good stuff at the top!
That’s a massive oversimplification but go check it out if you’re not already familiar with it!
Society imposes base lines on what it considers to be “normal” and we, as citizens of that society, for the most part, strive to live lives that conform to that design.
The proof of that can be found in Society itself… it’s hanging together still, right? …
We’re not fighting tooth and nail for our own survival in a Mad Max style Post Apocalyptic world… at least, not at the time of writing this!
So we can agree that Society has a model and we more or less conform to the advantages and provision of that Society!
The problem is, this Society that provides for us, doesn’t do much to care for our mental wellbeing.
It’s far too busy being tugged and pulled in all directions by our basic human needs and trying to find an equitable balance between all the disparate needs and whims of it’s citizens.
When it tries to provide for our mental wellbeing, it finds out that it doesn’t really understand exactly what that means.
Mental Health is a tough subject – tough to understand, tough to open up about and tough to offer support with.
Particularly when the systems of our Society are rapidly driving us away from past norms that helped!
As we move ever closer to greater levels of self dependence and independence, we move further away from the structure and accountability that once existed… It’s a push, pull thing!
Humans fear the unknown more than anything. We are creatures of habit and we live by our learned expectations of normal.
And that’s what Society aims to provide for us…
When what we actually need, is each other!
We need empathy, we need other people around us to take the time, we need to be heard, we need to be understood and we need to be valued.
Wedding Industry Mental Health from Wedding Espresso is all the above and more.
We’re a society of Wedding Suppliers that care! About each other, and about our mission to improve Wedding Industry Mental Health the world over.
I invite you to join us: